Get bf off Anon Babble, hes American and I'm European

The extreme sensitivity to any criticism is not good if he refuses to improve on it

if you have to win him over with every important decision then why date him foid? yall only seem to like a relationship more the harder it is to make it work

yeah but it's just confusing when he promises me he'll react better to criticism and doesn't follow up on that promise. I'm just at loss for what to do, like what's his goal here? because he doesn't seem to want to get another girlfriend, and he's pulled this stunt before and did the same thing. does he want me to come chase after him so he can feel loved or what? because his parents pretty much want us to get married and he's kind of friendless so I imagine hes lonelier than usual

poor guy is fucking rich and still subjecting himself to a sexless ldr with a total bitch that treats him like a beta
brootal bp

yeah youre right
like i mentioned here, he recognizes that it's a flaw of his and he's talked about improving it but after a couple months he'll often break that promise.
girls online tell me they'd end things with him because of this but that I shouldn't cuz he's wealthy or whatever but I don't want that that to matter

youre a good person but your confused

yeah this message has all the hallmarks of a manipulator. "when i get angry and sperg out over shit that is normal, it's because i'm HUMAN, not because i'm wrong"
ditch this fag or keep suffering by his push and pull, mood swinging games

It's amazing how even when women get their delusional fantasy of scoring the "gorgeous rich virgin guy somehow every other woman overlooked" they have to act like a child and demand even more.
You don't deserve him. It sounds like he's just trying to break up with you nicely, since he's realized you're immature and going to be a project. He's not a virgin anymore, and since you had to give him a hard time, he's lost his innocence about putting pussy on a pedestal.
Take the L and move on. You blew it.

You are supposed to be with him the rest of your life, is having to argue with him over everything due to him being intransigent enjoyable? Do the good of the relationships outweigh this being a permanent strain? Also money may make someone happy but does not matter for a relationship particularly imo.

sthu it's the guy who is acting like the bitch here. "Uuuuu you love me and all but, but you're committing the horrible crime of calling out the issues i have because you want me to be better ;-; and that's like, really bad because my parents agree with you too, and want me to treat you better too ;-;"
the only sad thing is if op keeps sucking up to him but she probably will cause hes wealthy or doesnt know what its like to talk with a guy who actually has feelings and cares for hers too

well... you wouldn't be happy to know that he's into femdom... and wants me to engage in it... yeah
it makes sense that he's trying to break up in some ways but I get the impression he'd take me right back if I "chased" him. most of the argument he talked about how meeting up with me is the best thing ever and that it's the reason he lives. that's the other reason that a proper breakup doesn't seem to be the case, he really just blocked me out of the blue in the most flighty matter possible and was genuinely happy when I reassured him I loved him

which was triggered by the criticism*
oh yeah that's something he says a lot. "you can't expect me to be perfect. every guy you'll meet will be worse than me or have my exact flaws so you better not have a problem with them!"
hes even told me he wonders if he has a personality disorder once

so is he saying that he's dependent on you too? that without you he'd be nothing and khs or something?
LEAVE THIS FAG and tell his parents to get him therapy. he needs therapy, not you, because he is just using you as a toy like every other abusechad, things will keep getting worse the longer you refuse to abandon him, right now he's just laying out the bait to pull you back in, DO NOT CAVE

but ze sun is too bright i cannot go :(

the fuck

that's fucked because anyone who genuinely wants to be better would accept that you are right and that his flaws are flaws to be worked on, just because of the fact that they upset you. if you are doing it for someone you love, some behavioral issues can be mitigated. he clearly hasn't worked on remedying the issues you see or wanted to other than some vague promises that he will to appease you.
for the last time leave this fag or at the very least tell his parents his behavior is getting to be unacceptable for you

hes alluded to that a lot but as you can see hes not the most emotionally stable I suppose. God knows he might do an 180 and be okay with singledom.
so you think I should just go no contact? at the very least for a little while like 2 weeks or smth?
a breakup is a hard pill to swallow because I do genuinely love him and I find this entire "argument" sooo silly and avoidable. like if something miniscule had gone different we wouldn't be in this mess and he'd be planning his trip here but alas. I just can't tell if his flaws are so bad that I should try to move on or if they're redeemable and I should give him a chance

i'm on my phone so i can't fully type paragraphs but basically, he's pulling the stunt of blocking you to FORCE you to engage, to take away your time to think, the more autonomy and control you have the better. and going no contact for a while or seriously threatening to, any way to truly assert yourself is the ideal move. but he sounds like my dad and you my mom, and as a kid born into THIS family, ooh boy i would do anything to have a different father than one who does not give a shit about upsetting the whole family by constantly fighting with her. it'll never change as long as he sees you as wrong and there's no sign he doesn't, so the best move to me is to not bother and move on

Well, hun, now you know. Next time, choose a guy who isn't fucked in the head, and knows how to be a leader and an inspiration to his woman.
Protip: you won't find that here on r9k.

Paste your chatlog from the last 100 days into @grok and ask if you're being horrible.

I was jealous of OP having a rich boyfriend until I read this

well... you wouldn't be happy to know that he's into femdom... and wants me to engage in it... yeah

I guess no man is perfect.

he talked about how meeting up with me is the best thing ever and that it's the reason he lives

This is cringe, no self-respecting man should say shit like this.
No contact is also cringe.
Incidentally your reasoning for why you don't want to visit him is also very dumb. You're likely both idiots, but from your side of the story it seems like he's more retarded than you are.

nigga you are crazy if you read the rest of the thread and thought he sounded perfect

He doesn't want you that bad if he's okay with distance. Because that means you are out of his grip and you could move on any time or get fucked by another.
Men are out here killing themselves or driving across the whole continent for women they are obsessed with.

I suppose he is fond of you but he knows he can find someone "better" or whatever.

I don't think you'd say "I'll love you forever even from a distance" to someone that you don't particularly care about unless you're a pathologic liar.

I didn't say that! But having a super wealthy partner seems like the dream because you and him (or her) can just relax in theory and aren't victims to the whims of life and wage cuckery.

You can change a lot of things about how you behave to each other and work on that, but fetishes and true sexual preference are mostly inherent and if he's a femdom faggot it's just a huge turn off that is hard to deal with sexually. He can only pretend to be a switch or dominant, but it would be all fake.

you literally have to be rich as fuck to get a gf on this board

if you manage to do that, you get to pump and dump prime virgin women

It's kind of funny: what should be evidence against the blackpill at first, ends up reinforcing it by the end.

I mean he's already lying because if he loved her so strongly that it would last FOREVER he would not throw her away or push her away over completely nonsensical shit. He's just lying and manipulating.

You don't know what she said to him at all. And she doesn't want to visit him because the fucking UV radiation in his state is higher.

If you love someone, you don't throw them away. Are you for real nigga? Especially over some dumb shit. She didn't cheat on him or threaten to kill his parents.

well you are acting a little too difficult for me good bye! but I TOTALLY LOVE U FOREVERZ

lol imagine being a trust fund baby who comprises "literally top 1% wealth in america" from a rich family and what you end up with is some fucking deranged Anon Babble cunt like you. your bf is a fucking moron with no standards and no self worth, that is if your story were real, which it isn't.

lol and op will probably fall for it.

okie my bad i didn't mean to hurt your feewings, you can beat me when i visit you again since i was such a bad gurl ;') i can't wait when we have a child and you can yell at and hit them too!

He's a femdom guy so he probably wants OP to beat him and crush his balls and put a dildo in his ass.

I will definitely stay no contact for a while. thank you anon and I'm sorry you have that kind of family dynamic. it's funny that a dysfunctional family made you more mature while my ex had a perfect family and still is... yeah
that's what im wondering about. he doesn't react well to being called a liar or a manipulator though (some other girls called him this and he freaked out when he found out) he will claim I'm "calling him horrible!!!" all over again and yeah. the only thing is that he has pretty high or rather specific standards for looks and personality and he's even told his parents that he doesnt believe any other woman fits them so I do genuinely think he won't get with another woman and if he did the same problems would arise.

he's not a victim, if OP's poorly written fake story full of plotholes is true then this guy is a mark and deserves every stupid thing his horrible self inflicted choices bring upon him

You are soulless, or at the very least have no love for your ex-boyfriend, I don't understand why you made this thread.
You're retarded for worrying about UV by the way, unless you're an albino, but you're probably just some vapid normal.

If you love someone then you also don't refuse to visit them over the sun being a little bit stronger where he lives than where you live. It's not like OP's falling over herself trying to make it work. Though that makes sense after finding out that he's a femdomfag.

he's a rich bitch who probably wants you just because you are genuine and willing to tolerate his femdom perversions, news flash: he is not returning your effort and honesty if he is that offended by being called out for upsetting you, and he can find another chick to peg his slutty rich bitch bussy, but alright, hope you learn to value maturity

You can have your own quirks and opinions in life while loving someone, are you okay bro? Not agreeing to meet parents at a specific date isn't the same as throwing someone OUT OF YOUR LIFE LIKE TRASH.

Well, he's playing the victim and probably isn't a "true lover" if he's mostly concerned with good looks and you fulfilling his desires and if not you will be removed and replaced by another doll.

oh and cont. one last thing, he can afford therapy so yea, his fault for being like this

and because of ICE randomly detaining europeans and because I'm insomniac and idk how I'd hide that from his parents plus he wages long hours and I'd just be chilling in his room until he comes back which feels kind of inappropriate. id feel like i should spend time with his sister and mother while hes gone but I'm scared of being extra awkward and making a fool out of myself and thats why I'd rather him come HERE. which he's open to. we just didn't get to discuss that before he blocked me
he also believes in first love and doing right by christ. he also told me that he likes my personality, probably at the same rate as compliments over my looks but I just feel awkward typing that out in the open...

implying therapy helps men

>Im reluctant to because the UV is deadly in his state during the summer

>ICE is detaining random Germans traveling to the US, not German but kinda worrying

Kek you don't love him and he can tell.

he also believes in first love and doing right by christ

Did you fuck when you visited?
If yes, his actions betray his words.

I'm getting mixed signals from this thread... I don't want him to believe this... agh

he also believes in first love and doing right by christ.

So did you even have sex or anything if he's a first love christian guy he should wait until marriage?

I don't know but he seems almost emotional like a woman, pushing you away over some mild issues, instead of being stoic and taking care of you. It's not love. It's only love if he comes around again.

sending a man to therapy

sending anyone to therapy

This is why nobody should ever listen to women

yeah if my gf visited me once then wouldn't come back become "Sun too bright, trump is meanie :(" I'd break up too. actually dumbest foid post on r9k

no, but he did touch my boobs (sorry christ). we would masturbate next to eachother (sorry again)
we hugged and held hands and kissed for the first time though. we both want to wait until marriage with piv and oral etc (not anal please don't ask)

anon.. women are often insane and what you are doing is still on the lower scale of "weird".. i threatened to beat my husband up in the past, destroyed his room, ran away, attempted suicide and he never let me go or down, he would keep believing in me and telling me that he loves me and will fix it.. if a man truly loves you he will weather any storm (besides maybe truly unforgivable crap like cheating, aborting behind his back or whatever) because he knows he can't replace you and he LOVES you.. if he can push you away this easily over some laughable crap he just doesn't want you that bad.. maybe with some distance he will return to you though, maybe the distance will push him back to you, but obviously that's not a guarantee..

yeah if my gf visited me once then wouldn't come back become "Sun too bright, trump is meanie :(" I'd break up too. actually dumbest foid post on r9k

You don't love her then. That's fine. But true and strong love doesn't work like that, it's irrational and just a matter of fact. You adore that person and losing them would tear you apart. If you can discard them so easily it's not love, it's maybe fondness or lust.

Have you considered that maybe you're just BPD?

throwing away someone you "love" over irrelevant shit

That's true love and if you don't agree you have BPD!

Get the fuck out of here.

i hate how men and women use the word love in vain it's so annoying most of these retards never loved and you see it in dating culture anyway so many different relationships and partners everyones replacable

I don't know but he seems almost emotional like a woman, pushing you away over some mild issues, instead of being stoic and taking care of you. It's not love. It's only love if he comes around again.

this is what I was a bit afraid of hearing because I think you're spot on. if he doesn't come around then I'd start to feel like he never loved me. I feel or worry he might only want to talk to me if I initiate. but some anon are claiming he might genuinely believe I don't love him either which makes the situation complicated because that might be the reason he's acting the way he is. perhaps I didn't reassure him enough? but I've also been super affectionate these past few months (more so a couple weeks ago than recently)
sorry for rant

but le T R U E L O V E is irrational, if he's not willing to kill himself in minecraft for you then he doesn't love you (it doesn't matter if the girl can't be bothered to do shit for him though, that doesn't count)

So you've been very affectionate, spend a lot of time with him as possible, but because you have some autism over visiting his parents (which is a highly stressful situation for you, like he should put himself in your shoes as a normal guy meeting his giga rich and succesful girlfriends parents) he decides you don't love him and he drops you off at the side of the road? Lol.

If you aren't willing to die for someone, you don't love them, that is true. People would be willing to die for their pets. Parents would die for their kids. Some friends would even die for their friends.

Love is basically that the other person's happiness and safety is fundamental to your own, they are part of your heart.

If you have a wife or husband and she wouldn't be willing to risk her life for you or your child, would you say she loves you with all of her heart? I wouldn't. I'd run in a fire even for my dog.

Do you think OP would die for his boyfriend?

Not sure, I don't know her. But if she thinks he is replaceable and she wouldn't risk her life to save him, I don't think her love is genuine.

But true and strong love doesn't work like that, it's irrational and just a matter of fact.

Love is an exchange of comforts and material. If you're unwilling to participate in the part of the exchange you're being tasked with (coming for a visit) then I don't see what's surprising about them breaking things off. He's saving both of you time by not waiting until you're more involved with each other, and you're weird excuses become a bigger drain on him. Sucks to be you though, you had a nice meal ticket there.

I cant think anymore desu I give up. maybe it's because i was less affectionate these past few weeks (exam period and insomnia flaring up) but we still stream and play games together whenever we can. he kept talking about how I dont love him during the argument but his only examples were "you haven't been enthusiastic about meeting up with me/not initiating it/avoiding it/etc", "it's a gut feeling" and "its just that i need some sort of assurance and explanation on what your love and need for me actually is" and I didn't give in to that immediately because I was a bit upset over the fight. that might be it. I might simply not have given him enough reassurance desu but that's not a good look

I'm going to hide this thread.
It's insane to me that some of you are so invested in this dumb broad's life that you'd reply multiple times.

Love is an exchange of comforts and material.

That's not love, that's a business. Your view is deeply transactional and cynical about love, reducing it to a barter system of comfort and material exchange. Love is fundamentally an emotional bond, built on trust, care, understanding and vulnerability. A healthy partner doesn't "task" their significant other - they communicate, understand, and collaborate to find compromises unless it's completely unreasonable like actual illegal or disgusting shit.

Sucks to be you though, you had a nice meal ticket there.

I'm not OP, you monkey.

If you believe that just write him a heartfelt letter once more. Just put ALL your feelings down, how you see him, what you feel and how the current situation weighs on you. You have nothing to lose.

If this guy is genuine about loving you, he will read this and at least talk to you.
If this guy is manipulative and already thinking about replacing you with the next hot girl, he won't care or make more excuses. In that case you won, because you exposed him as a fraud and you can move on with your life.

nigga, quit being a fucking stupid girl and go visit him for 4-5 months. just tell him you were having a stupid foid moment.

sounds like he has BPD or something OP. Not much you can do

the choice is between waiting to see if he comes back on his own after some time has passed like some anons habe suggested to see if he truly "wants/loves" me. the other option would be to take the first step like I've done in the past just to give him reassurance. I see pros and cons with both options, what makes me worry is that the last one kind of gives the message it's okay to be flighty and block me whenever he feels bad. and if this is because of some deeper personality issue (like he's told me he worries he has + being very emotional and not being able to control his enotions at times) then it could be seen as me "enabling" it to spiral out of control

sorry for venting to you guys... this thread helped clear my head a bit and gave me some potential insight into why he did what he did

he didn't like you that much to begin with
if his family is top 1% he could've easily arrange to be with you or for you to be with him and see where that leads but he never cared that much

>his dad makes millions annually

>literally top 1% of wealth in America

Oof
You fucked that up lmao
Have fun being a poor old wagie the rest of your life

he could've easily arrange to be with you or for you to be with him and see where that leads

yeah I mean this isn't the problem, I met up with him early January and his dad paid for it with his credit card points (which I'm extremely grateful for) and he has the money to see me again but unfortunately ICE, the sun, my insomnia and his waging hours are kind of things he can't control

so wait, you're telling me i can just lie about my parents making millions of dollars, and random foids will fly to me and suck me off?

you do realize I uh... met his parents and saw their mansion and visited his dad's business and saw that he owns a black card and that I flew first class and that I got VIP tickets to Disney and a $800 dress for Christmas... none of which I asked for btw I hope it doesn't sound like I'm bragging but I can assure you he didn't lie

i think i can pull it off. im not rich-rich like your boyfriend's dad but i own a golden credit card (not like it matters) and have 100k in the stock portfolio (not like it matters).

well you don't need to lie tons of people would consider that impressive already

Imagine being so desperate you put up with this kind of bullshit. Must suck not to have options.

tons of people would consider that impressive already

golden credit card is like 8 bucks a month, and you save 100k within 10 years very easy by not overspending, and i would argue that you can save 100k within 5 years if you live with parents and don't pay any rent.

soulmates u wouldn't get it golem