/30+/

I just wrote to my ex whom I've been married with. Mundane stuff. Her answers were polite but uninterested. I'm drinking more.

Mine won't even answer me

31. Me like gym.

30+ thread - I'll do it tomorrow edition

What is that thing you keep putting off?

nothing right now
I started classes again because I lack hs so I can actually start some edu that will actually give me a real job later, but summer now so
applied for jobs, got none so I am poor
I can't do anything right now except apply for more jobs or something and just do nothing this entire summer since I am not allowed to work since I can't get a job so I will just bleed money from the cash I won't be earning
other than that? idk, become a multimillionaire? start a business? I have no energy, know how, anything to get shit done
idk
I should get a driving license but I have no cash to blow on it and I won't be getting more now either so what can I do now? still nothing

this but not old enough more like 80

>going to the dentist

o yea I need to do clean up + check + bleach my teeth desu

why are you guys so beta willingly? unironically?
brutal

They have no chance with any other women so all they can do is bark up the same tree until they die.

I'm in a great mood at the moment because my chronic joint pain is in remission. It's nice to actually get to play video games for an hour or so without crippling pain.

What is that thing you keep putting off?

living

I've fucked a bunch of women since then, but it's empty. Women are empty. My wife has a soul. That's why I'm coming back. Of course, little incel bitches think sex is the alpha and omega of every interaction.

I'm sorry to hear that. I don't know if it's better or worse than polite interest. In your case, I could believe there is still something going on, even if it's resentment. In my case, politeness demonstrates that she's completely over me.

I'm sorry anon.

At this point programming is the only thing I'm good at and I stopped enjoying it long time ago, but there is no other job that suits me better.

What have we become?

A reflection of what we were, a shadow of what we could have been and an obituary or what we will never be.

Humans, like we always should have been. I mean what did you expect, to be a fucking anime protagonist? We're in the real life, and real life sucks and always did, for everybody. Normies coping with relationships, sex, money, fleeting power, mirage of an influence, are even more dead inside than a smart, intelligent person.
All that bullshit we've looked forward towards when we were ignorant kiddies full of hope and delusion at the age of 5 or 6 isn't real. Just like Santa is not real. And the tooth fairy isn't real either. The only question is, when does one learn about the fake non-existing shit and just accepts the harsh reality.

Just like Santa is not real. And the tooth fairy isn't real either.

Huh?

I haven't properly cleaned my apartment for so god damn long. Really there's a few things but that's bugging me the most, knowing I surrounded by dust, that the floor hasn't been vacuumed, that my bathroom floor is covered in hair. It's gross

After 38.7 years of inceldom, I might finally be getting some unpaid pussy.
An early 50s widow who manages a property company and hasn't been fucked in a decade.
In a sense, she is the perfect escape from inceldom, if it happens. Could very much be an ongoing thing too.
I had two of my greatest chances to fuck a woman screw up in the past month, because of my 'tism and decades of incel insecurity.
I thought this latest one had cut me off yesterday, but she's still in touch. This wait for a slot to go over and fuck her for a few hours is excruciating.
She's aware of my anxiety and low experience issues, and seems somewhat attracted to me, calling me a sexy beast.
I told her I always screw up the talking stage, so it seems there's mostly radio silence until I can see her. We spoke this morning.

What is that thing you keep putting off?

Sorting out, or throwing out stuff that's in my dead mother's room. She died ten years ago. I miss her and I wish to join her and my dad every day.
Also have a bunch of correspondence piled up over the last decade. I should sort it, but I never will.

put this guote into google

results: obituaries

grim

I think I don't enjoy anything. My main hobbies are reading, movies, fishing, drawing and playing the guitar. Every single social interaction I have revolves around drinking.
They all have escapism in common. Wheter it is from others, from myself, from my house, from the city, from people, they just turn my brain off one way or another.
There's nothing I do out of pure joy.

Hi boom-booms. When did y'all realize you were old? when did you realize you no longer had potential and life passed you by? B cause I fear wasting my life.

You're me, it's uncanny how some people express my thoughts so clearly

License unironically

when did you realize you no longer had potential

I always had potential and I still have it, but I never had any will to put it into use. The thing is I never really cared or took life seriously, I never wanted to "make it", I never wanted anything beyond living a relatively comfortable and stress free life.
Every single time I had to make a display of willpower or discipline I was forced to do so. When I lost my previous job I learned to code in a year and got a job, and I only liked it in a childish way, I enjoyed the challange, and once it was over, I stopped caring.

Turned 40 a month ago, met a 18 years old unicorn and she dumped me for a guy her age... I really want to die and even the wife is taking it very badly

That's what you get when you don't have to face judgment. I can talk here just like I'd talk to myself.
Kind of funny to think the only place I'll ever get a genuine, pure human interaction is an anonymous imageboard.

calling me a sexy beast

seems somewhat attracted to me

anon i know you said you have the tism so i'm gonna be direct
she wants to fuck your brains out

My wife has a soul.

No she doesn't, you pathetic retard.

My wife has a soul.

still does not refute the beta acting part

my sweetest friend......

I would bang milfs/gilfs but my libido got cooked a while ago, like literally what felt over day it went from needing to coom 3 times a day to fucking cooked
I did not even change my routine/life/diet
it just swapped
now I don't care mostly, shit does not even interest me
nihilism keeps claiming all my earthly desires
now there is nothing left

whenever I can sleep and not think is the only enjoyment really

24

still feel young, trying to fix education in life

27

failure of that a few years later and extreme depressive episode
start realizing all my problems are economical and I can't start my life
feel like life is slipping by and that I am actually getting old

37

a decade of nothing good passed by and unable to start life
legitimately realize I am actually old now

i wanna

"make it"

so i can

living a relatively comfortable and stress free life.

saving from page 10

Laundry. I know it's there, just, waiting...

I think I forget to have fun the most. Between parenting and working from home I don't do much just for me anymore. When I have the energy I'm busy and when I have the time I'm tired.

a decade of nothing good passed by and unable to start life

legitimately realize I am actually old now

same tbqh
i was entering early 30s
the usual neet swings between panic and apathy
then covid
BOOM
late 30s
it's a waking nightmare that never subsides
my youth is gone
my life is gone
it happened before i knew what happened

whatever illusion of anime protag is gone
i can't even take the normie path since that time has come and passed
i will always be an old failure

also i finally understand the sperging about hairloss
i hit the wall there. my hairline vanished.
my ID was being doubted because they think it's not me in the picture
eventually stopped getting ID'd at all
that's when i knew it was well and truly over