/social anxiety general/ #1

Take a break from the gendered verbal violence and just chill/joke/vent/chat/hang out with people who can relate.

Idk I'm not good at this and I'm nervous. Do you guys think this is a stupid idea and stupid intro?

Do you guys think this is a stupid idea and stupid intro?

no it's good, i can't tell tho how much engagement that will get

I guess engagement might be a problem here. But I hope we can catch a few social butterflies anyway.

I don't know if I have social anxiety or autism.

I hate having social anxiety so much. I have learned that the anxiety stems from my fear of rejection, which is so extreme that it leads me to avoid any social situation that could result in rejection, no matter how unlikely any sort of rejection actually is. Too bad that knowing this isn't enough to resolve the issue.

voca.ro/1f9Ysg1vkmaK

Probably both. Maybe! I know for a fact I have social anxiety, I've never been diagnosed with autism but I have some suspicions that I'm on the spectrum in some sense.
Yes, fear of rejection, fear of judgement. I can relate. I won't try to offer any advice because I don't know you well enough, but I hope you're coping alright. Feel free to vent here.

I did some therapy for depression and anxiety and my therapist said I probably have adhd and autism, but she can't officially diagnose it.
The weird thing is though, that I usually know what to say, it's just that it doesn't flow in the moment. I also have other symptoms like light sensitivity.

It still hurts bro. You cut me deep, vocarooanon, I'll be okay but it stings.

I think I have some adhd symptoms too, which contributes to my anxiety. Definitely have depression, but that kinda goes hand-in-hand with anxiety and I think the social anxiety is the bigger issue for me. Idk about light sensitivity though I have noticed by vision being weird with light lately. This is me trying to relate to you by talking about similar things about myself, which may be autistic.

That's pretty based and confident-pilled. I've never just gone to a show like that alone, I was always with some people who had invited me. Which I guess sounds kinda social, but I don't know if I'd be able to do it with just me and my thoughts for company.

girl on a dating app asked me to a dinner date
thing is, i'm 5'4, NEET, carless and in a different city, and i'm gay

Tell her you're gay, maybe you can make a fag-hag friend. I've heard women like gay guys, though I can't personally attest.

That's nice of you to say, but it's less that I'm confident and more that I don't actually have any friends that I could go to things with.

i am 38, and i have given up being social, or trying. slob-maxing, so it is easy to avoid having people even want to talk to me. also i have ocd, depression, bpd, and probably some sort of autism. so all together, i am hopeless.

You able to get NEETbux with those diagnoses? I hope so, my friend. I get it myself for different shit.

yeah, i have since i was about 19. had a very good caseworker, as far as he was able to get me on that stuff. get like $1900 a month. i have tried to work, but it always ends in a meltdown of some sort.

I'm glad to hear it, man. Sounds like you get a pretty sweet deal, I get the base payment in my country which is about $940 USD. It works out well enough. I tried to work, myself. Didn't end well, lost a lot of jobs. I consider myself retired nowadays, mostly play games and read books and go out in nature and write. What do you do with your time?

Hey you made it to second date, thats farther than alot of us have! Try your best anon!

My psychiatrist keeps asking me to try group therapy, an autism support group or making friends but I freak out so much in social situations.
He's probably right that isolation is worsening my other problems but socializing was daunting even before years as a neet.

I know that feel. Still it's really good to yourself that you go even without friends. I think that's kinda inspiring. I would be your friend, anon, and join you in stuff if you needed someone to go with.

I tried group therapy for social anxiety. It was kinda nice once I was able to actually attend. The first session I had a panic attack in the parking lot and left crying. But I made it to the second session. It's tough to push through but I think it's worth doing. Even if the group thing doesn't help much itself, just knowing that you were able to do it is a pretty good achievement.

I think I'll give it some consideration, I pretty much dismissed it without any thought when he mentioned it. Maybe when he next calls I'll ask for some more details about it and see if I can drag myself to it once.

fucking gigachad out here going on real life dates

Not really social anxiety but I have trauma from severe bullying/exclusion that was so bad I had to change schools, a massive multi-year long friend betrayal, multiple dog attacks, and sexual assault. Some days I am ok and I can leave the house and larp normalfag enough to do errands or even work part time other days like today I get paranoid at any sound outside and think of every negative scenario and get too afraid to leave the house. I just dissociate and can't stop crying thinking about another pitbull attacking us or someone trying to fuck with me. I hate my fucking life

This thread topic seems nice. OP has a good idea for once. Can't wait until the self-righteous tripfags come in to cover it in shit.

I think the fact I have social anxiety/avpd stems from the fact that I'm an extremely weird and insufferable person and there's nothing I can do to change that. I could be not shy but I would rather be ignored than hated. The thing I really don't understand is normal/likable people being shy, which I see a lot of. It never even began for me ^_^ Even writing this message I know how annoying I will come across, I hope it's just in my head but I don't think so.

Jesus. Sounds like you have some serious CPTSD going on. You've been through some shit.

I would rather be ignored than hated

Man that hits home.

Is it social anxiety or just BPD if any noise in the house makes me paranoid and run directly to check if anything happened
Even a few decibels over "normal" talk startles me, this only happens in my family house and nowhere else
For reference my family especially uncles used to get into petty quarrels and disputes and fights outside pretty frequently but now they're way too old for that but i still maintain the same compulsions and reactions
Doesnt help that my grandma was old and sickly so i had to run also quite a few times in case she was in a bad spot

Whoa! The first in a series (hopefully) of social anxiety generals? This must be serendipity. I've struggled with social anxiety for most of my teen and adult life; still find it difficult just to stand in line at the grocery store. I'm also diagnosed with Asperger's, ADHD, and OCD.
I am so afraid of being judged. Summer's almost here and I want to go places and do stuff but I have no one to go with. I'd go myself but I never enjoy being far from home when I'm alone and every interaction feels like fight or flight. I'm tired of rotting in my room but... what other choice do I have? The only thing I'm brave enough to do by myself is go for walks around town.

I have this one memory of being about 12 and suddenly realising that I was never going to have a job, I was never going be loved or fit in, that there was just something really wrong with me I couldnt put my finger on. That feeling has just followed me forever. Im terrified of other people and just see them all as better than me, and how arent they? They all have jobs, friends, they're carefree and things just seem to happen to them. Whereas I've been paralysed so long It feels like normal people live in a different reality

I'm sorry :( I really relate, I actually feel like I live in a different reality to 95% of people despite being surrounded by them. Personally I have very little empathy for them because of this, for example my roommate occasionally cries and complains and stuff because of troubles with her boyfriend and all I feel is awkwardness that I have to deal with that, I could not care less and hope she feels worse because it would be a fraction of what I go through. Sorry if this gives the rest of you all a bad name, this is just how I feel. I am genuinely living in hell, I don't consider myself alive.

Such a fucking mood. I'm afraid they're going to think I'm full of myself. The OP pic is super relatable too.

WTF this thread is about social anxiety. If you're going on dates how bad can it be?

That just sounds like some mild PTSD to me. I also grew up in a home with the occasional heated argument so I can kind of relate to a degree.

Sorry if this gives the rest of you all a bad name, this is just how I feel.

Not at all. She doesn't know how good she has it and should be more considerate. At the same time, you can't just tell her to her face, right? That would be rude... I get it.

general about social anxiety

suddenly every post is about dating

They're doing this on purpose, aren't they? I fucking hate this website.

I'm probably going to end up like you two. Tried working in my early twenties and just couldn't handle the pressure. Now I'm just a NEET watching the days go by on the calendar.
I want to join an autism support group. It would probably be a group of New Balance-wearing Norwood victims and trannies but I'll take anything at this point. How do I join?
This is encouraging.

You're describing me at age 14 after my mom would pick me up and I'd go totally nonverbal. It was a weird feeling I didn't have a word for. Cold tendrils wrapping around my soul and filling it with dread and loneliness.

overhear two female acquaintances of mine talking to eachother

"He just doesn't act like a single man, so if there's any girl who likes him they think he's not interested and so they move on"

ask them who they're talking about

"You"

mfw

This should be renamed to /sag/ and the op image is always a pair of sagging hairy balls and the people who post here are called /sag/gers

This but but saggy H cups instead

OP here. I'm not against it if it takes off. I think this thread has been mildly successful and I'm glad other SAers (lol) were able to meet and find understanding

do any of you guys have a job

i tried to get one once but i was fighting off a panic attack mid interview and the guy was looking at me with a mixture of pity and revulsion. i see everyone around me with jobs and skills and they just are allowed into society and its like i can never ever be a part of it in the most basic way.

yes i spent like a year looking for a job and ended up being hired at a retail store because it used ai for interviews instead of people. i've been here for almost 2 years now and im still the weird quiet guy

Pretty bad, I am getting nothing out of them. 90% ghosts after the first date without explanation

I have a job. It was mostly work from home when I got hired which was working fairly well for me. Now we're back in the office and I'm struggling. I'm averaging 1 or 2 mental health days a week just to cope so far. It's not the being in the office part that's horrible, it's the anticipation and anxiety that keeps me from sleeping the night before and then I'm a absolute wreck in the morning and constantly running late even when I do go in because I'm mentally preparing myself in the morning. Some days when I get enough sleep somehow I'm fine and it feels like such a golden opportunity on those days. Idk bros. Sleep is just so important. Good, quality, lengthy, restful sleep. Good to bed at a decent time tonight, bros, and learn to enjoy that. That's my advice. Eat healthier, sleep healthier, even some exercise. It's easier said than done, and I'm certainly not one to preach, but it's just so important for us I think.

How's that treating you? I worked retail for 2 years and it left me with really bad trauma from the way I was treated. My co-workers were awesome, though; they really got me through it.

How do I join?

There could be a group in your area. My psych gave me all the info about my local group, if you are in a city there is probably one.
Could be a waste of time but in a month or two I'll post about it if I actually manage to go.

I was never going be loved or fit in

same. even my family treated me like shit

Good luck my dude. Anything to feel less alone in this big wide world is an improvement.