Hello anons

Question

Hello anons

hello anons
my friend who doesnt use Anon Babble wants your opinions about his "ideology" or something

what he believes in:

doesnt think he deserves compliments and gets unnerved when he gets called handsome. he prefers insults and being called ugly because its more "honest"

he craves love, care, and help but when hes given the opportunity he pushes them away because he thinks he doesnt deserve any of it

would most rather coach his friends than to be in a more stable relationship

hes probably just depressed and gay and has avoidant attachment and a degredation kink but he really wanted me to make this post so its whatever. lmk your opinions

self hatred is bad for you, I had that as well

ive told him this MULTIPLE times and theres literally no way to convince him to love himself

I don't think this is considered an ideology he just has a shitty self esteem and is scared of attachment. You can figure this out by yourself by just thinking a little bit as to why you feel the way you do, stupidass. Go to the timeout corner, and be alone with your thoughts.

im not him
i tried telling him hes just depressed and is scared of attachment but he keeps saying its his ideology. its cope

I was mentally ill myself and I think a part of me just found my own extreme self hatred to be getting silly
I had to realize it myself so idk what you can say

Well tell him what I said. It absolutely is cope. I'm guessing he wanted you to post this for validating comments, wouldn't be surprised, its easy to get that on r9k of all places where guys live to pity themselves over not having sex or something.
Its not bad to want to feel validated, everybody wants that, but if you start coping hard like that and not listening to logic (like what you and I are saying: you're depressed, you have low self esteem), then you are never going to get anywhere or solve this problem.
TLDR, he wants to whine about the problem instead of doing anything about it, I think.
Harsh, but, just try listening to me, do some deep thinking.

Cluster A Schizoid most likely

yeah i sent him the link to this thread and hes sleeping rn. he will view the replies on this thread later and i hope that he finally realizes that hes just being delusional and coping and needs to improve his life

Schizoid is not caring about wanting to be close to people, apathy. Liking the idea of it is nice, but it doesn't really sound like that from this post, just sounds like he has shitty self esteem, pushing people away because he doesn't think he deserves it, not because he doesn't feel anything towards the people.
Would need more context to tell, obviously, and an actual psychological assessment lol.
t. a likely schizoid.

I'd be interested in hearing his response, I'll be around.

Having a personal ideology over something so petty is retarded. Your friend sounds retarded. Call your friend a retarded faggot for me.

to be honest he doesnt really care about anything and is apathetic but i think thats how he always was
okayy. this thread probably will get archived before he wakes up though.

Ask him how his self hatred is beneficial for him

That sounds weird. I can't say for sure I understand it. Tell me more about him. What's he like? What's the sense you get of him as a person? Is he outgoing?

he

gets compliments

Interesting fantasy you've cooked up here
thankfully such a thing would never happen IRL so we don't need to ruminate on it

all he really does is play video games and draw/animate. he doesnt care about the world and hes apathetic. he literally doesnf care about anything

yo im the dude shes talking abt, and yea you could say its just a shitty self esteem, but why does suddenly everyone wanted me to believe i should stop thinking im ugly and many other things the moment they implanted that belief my entire childhood and teenhood, that sounds dumb now doesn't it? i dont know, people are weird

You may or may not be ugly pal but you sure are stupid

You were ugly then and you aren't now?
Idk.
What does it matter.
Don't accept the compliments but don't accept the insults either. Who cared what other people think. If they say you're handsome look instead at their motivation for saying you're handsome. It doesn't mean "lol u look good" but usually "i want to get closer / curry favor with you".

That's an interesting perspective, also yes i am stupid, and thats the truth i do accept, anon2 thats the thing, it doesn't affect me but it helped me get into a conclusion, since a majority called me ugly, then thats the truth, whats the point of thinking its not when majority wins?

Can you elaborate? Refer to these >>>>

>

Anxious/avoidant attachment style.

okay okay lemme answer them individually

1. Yes i do have a shitty self esteem and scared of attachment, not because im scared i might fumble it or anything, but because i've betrayed so much loved ones before that now i just believe i dont deserve having anyone anymore

2. maybe, but im more focused on seeing comments and their own personal opinion according to their respective perspectives, thats worse, i dont want to feel validated, i want to feel left, i left so many people in my life before, why shouldn't i be left out too? thats just what i deserve

3. i do care, i do crave for it, but i cant get closer, i know i dont deserve it, i NEED to pay the consequences i have for my actions by any means necessary, but the world keeps refusing and think thats enough, i dont think so

you know at first i thought this thread was about me but the only thing thats different is i use Anon Babble lol
anyway, if it helps to understand him, its difficult/impossible to believe people in good faith when you know for a fact some downsides about yourself are true
so you cant really be sure yourself whats just a white lie and whats true -- the natural defense mechanism is to assume people are lying

Im the guy shes talking about, but for the last part? i personally take everything with a grain of salt and see if its the truth or not according to my future experiences

do you have any examples of your suspicions being validated? it had to have been something significant for you to get like this
for me it was being told i was very smart growing up (and i didnt believe it), lo and behold i couldnt grasp high school level math and dropped out
since then i know people have been bullshitting me

hes probably just depressed and gay and has avoidant attachment

He's a vulnerable narcissist. And probably gay just like every nother narcissist

im diagnosed with NPD (vulnerable type) but i dont think hes a narcissist though. vulnerable narcissism is insecurity with entitlement but hes not entitled at all

He doesn't have a kink, that's typical low self image which is gay.
Tell him to not be gay

How does that affect my sexuality in any way, but i guess your logic is if i accepted facts rather than living in delusions, that makes me gay now?

Im just used to so many people calling me ugly, stupid, and many other things, that i just accepted it, i dont want to live in a delusion where i call myself handsome when im truly just not, and to be honest? i myself can see it

He doesn't mean it in the sense of homosexuality, he means in the sense of retarded.

But whats really gayer?
Living in acceptance of the truth
or
Living in Delusions of comfort for the sake of not looking "retarded"?

Also i may have forgot to mention but i am self aware, i do belive im a great artist, voice actor, and animator but when it comes to things that are simoky facts about myself regardless if it means im ugly, as long as thats the truth i'd belive it

living in acceptance of truth is gayer if you think the truth is that your ugly but in all honesty your way of thinking is just your way of fishing for pity

sounds like AVPD and anxiety/insecurity caused by bad childhood

Making posts for other males is gay, you're gay too.

pfff, which is why i only talk about i anynomously i know full well nothing can help, im just looking to see what others think, not fix it and i guess thats your way of coping, delusions is what many cling to for sanity anyway, reversing it makes it better for me

I guess

Holding on to other points now?

You're the one that asked about your sexuality, your question has been answered.

pfff, which is why i only talk about i anynomously i know full well nothing can help, im just looking to see what others think, not fix it and i guess thats your way of coping, delusions is what many cling to for sanity anyway, reversing it makes it better for me

cope.

Isn't my question whats the relation of my post to my sexuality and not what my sexuality is according to the post?

I can't really know for sure, but it sounds like your attitude is absurd and the very fact you call it an "ideology" tells me that, or you are poorly attempting to articulate it, unless I'm totally missunderstanding you.
At times I call myself retarded, ugly, and all of these things, in a way that has no emotionality behind it, and that's not about self hatred or defeatism, but I also don't really make it a thing of argument, not in a way where I'd call it an "ideaology" which I'll argue people on.
Correct me if I'm wrong but I get the sense that you too, aren't making this a thing of emotionality (unless it's about getting attention), but if that's the case I don't really see what the end is to your rationale.
If there's NO emotion at all behind it and it's pure numbness I suspect something else behind all of this, but I digress.

Pic motherfucking unrelated but I will post it because eh, I felt like it. Crah bahtit nigga.

Bon apetit n' sheeeiihh

finally, someone that made sense, well the reason why i was like this is because i spent my whole childhood to teenhood hearing from people i was ugly, stupid, all sort of things, now that i've grown suddenly people switched up the moment i accepted every word they told me, but i can see directly to their desperate attempts of trying to "save" me, their points always say "beauty is subjective" or whatever, yet never was i directly told i was handsome, which i concluded its a desperate attempt to make me think im not ugly, but not handsome either, i wouldn't call this an ideology thats true, i just dont know what better word to put it and my friend just placed it as ideology, and as for emotion wise, i dont feel any negative emotions regarding my thinking of me being ugly, in fact, im happy with this mindset, how im imperfect and ugly, and just accepting it rather than living with delusions is what makes me feel healthy

It's not really healthy if you get pissed when people tell you you're handsome. You might not agree with them but that doesn't mean they're lying.

I dont get pissed, i just feel unnerved or uncomfortable, like i have to think about it

I think I see where you're coming from now. I don't know if it's good or healthy but I think I've personally developed a sort of complex in the face of such things which allows me to navigate better in the face of such percieved realities, such that it's not really a matter of argument, or if there is argument, it's unspoken. I don't know if that makes any sense, I guess if there's any sense in that and you have any similar understanding then it's a ykyk kind of thing.
Right now my disposition in regards to it is not something I can really explain, beyond the word "indifference", but before I sort of internalized subhumanity as a cope then from that point said "ok so what" and that sort of helped me overcome social anxiety and such. I don't really think anything terrible about myself at the moment despite how that might sound.
What I'm saying is also undeniably retarded, but maybe you can see where I'm coming from.
Really right now, my mentality is this gif as far as I'm concerned niqqua I'm jus trying eat CHICKEN youtube.com/watch?v=0itOCgJtNVU
Alright now I'm getting retarded.

well then you still feel discomfort about it and arent actually okay with it. i feel the same way you do but i realized i feel guilty about thinking im anything special at all, which was really what was implanted into me by my parents and peers. i felt invisible and ugly. i still do at times and feel guilty about seeking any respite in the form of believing validation or accepting attention/affection. but, its really the only way. your inertia to connect has to overcome the discomfort around connection and feeling loved or regarded warmly by someone. idk, maybe that helps