Tovali edition
/britfeel/
Simon Mann passed away on May 8th, lads.
RIP to one of the last few real ones :(
what a shame
*informs the apus*
Haven't seen these beauties in a while.
Made it to Paris de lads
Coorrr, lad you one of those secret Anon Babble millionaires? Why you jet setting to Saudi Arabia and France and stuff?
nice evening for a sandford lane sesh
The country's over lads. Pack it up, we had a good run.
AI fucked the face
HHL was non-verbal until the age of 5
bbc.co.uk
sexless lads nationally shamed on the front page of BBC news for the crime of paying for sex. What, you thought you could use your hard earned warehouse wages to fulfil your basic human needs?
It is legal in the UK for a person to buy sexual services or be a sex worker. But associated activities such as kerb crawling, having sex in public and a sex worker loitering in a street or public place are illegal.
While some police forces still target women for loitering, the National Police Chiefs' Council (NPCC) now recommends not criminalising the women - who are often vulnerable - and instead targeting the men.
is it possible to satisfy these women with a 4 inch penis?
zimmy masturbating furiously to this picture
He did say he wanted to do Sandford Lane this weekend to 'get back into the swing of things'
What do you usually masturbate to, lad?
Me and crossy masturbating together x
OK, so, not plug and play exactly, hmm, lights shouldn't be on like this. OK, so, hmmm, I'm a fucking idiot. The switches are working, so I didn't break it, so that's a positive. Maan, it sucks being stupid, but it feels great when something gets fixed, and if not, THERE'S ALWAYS THE AXE.
Hmmmm fuckity fuck.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
whats this lid
do you often think about other men masturbating and the various ways they do it?
you could be accomplishing great things from your bedroom. you have all the tools.
Only for micrococks as I have a microcock fetish.
do you often think about other men masturbating and the various ways they do it?
...yh
Unironically just use chatgpt, it's good for tech support. The jeets are sweating.
Corrrrr I'm properly pissed now, lids. Had about 5 tinnies. Think I could reach 15.
I do yes. When I met Ebin in Scarborough I imagined him masturbating while we were chatting through the car window.
what you drinking lad?
It's like punishing the drug user while supporting the dealer.
It's the lid for this, unless you're calling me lid, and wondering about the stone?
oop, you're rolling forward
Carling
Weed pipe
Japanese food
Comfortable 20 degree temperature
Real gold mini dildos
Virgin media connection
Corrr and I do mean corr lad. You know how to live.
wouldnt mind detecting ruths USB error
picking up streetcrawlers
their problem tbqh. just go to a dodgy massage parlor
Had them Holsten Pils but now got Heineken and Stella. Bit of a mix really. Corrrrr. Sun is out too.
Drivel compass pointing towards Swanscombe
someone bites their nails
Love music me. Hope they play this song when I see them live
had a quick look at the drivel forecast earlier on and they reckon theres a big front of nobchatting pushing in from the southeast, must be the hot temperatures
rooms with hidden cameras
just asking to be blackmailed
Just had a shower now having a few cans before garn local for a few jars. Might as well. It Saturday x
Thought you might have been Smirnoffbro, but he wouldn't drink Holsten Pils, Heineken or Stella.
had a syrian kind of webab for the first time and it was lush. we need more of their refugees
Flights are not that expensive, you could go anywhere you wanted probably
Lad, you know that wooze makes you partial to a wag. Don't do it. You'll end up doing your wollocks in and regretting it. You can only have so many fresh starts.
Delivered by Mark Edwards in Swanage
Oh sorry to disappoint you, lid. I think he's dead.
Cheeky wag afterwards de lid? It Saturday x
Why doesn't Mark get a job? Honestly, why not?
why are you taking a photo of that?
he too fat and lazy
Oh aye, imagine a fat line to go with your cans x
he's got hidden disabilities. No one's going to hire someone who stinks of fish and shit.
Keeping to me own lane tonight lid so no bad influences around me. Only having a few pints then garn homes for a webab.
Qatari numberplate.
It's not that comfy, I have a hat on and hood up, and it's just naturally at that temp in here, and only 1 carlin darlin, that I nabbed from a friend last night.
I've never bitten my nails desu, I usually rip and tear them off.
No one's going to hire someone who stinks of fish and shit.
used to work with a lad in amazon who literally made people gag just from getting too close to him, HR got involved and everything but apparently he ended up getting sacked for getting into a fight with another lad in the locker room, other lad apparently went mental at smelly lad for walking up behind him for no reason
Lollers said Smirnoff is still alive and posting in his discord.
But you know that getting some jars in will make you more likely to want to get a bag. Come on, lad, this is hardly news to you, you've done it a million times before. Claimed you're only having a few drinks, then ending up calling your smackhead mates, they give you an overpriced bag of 5% cocaine and 95% crushed up drywall and then you end up doing your fucking bollocks in and regretting it.
Wish Helper and I lived in the same city and we would be best friends. It not right.
is it actually legal to get a slag off a website? huh
Why not just move to Sunderland? It's not as if the rent is particularly high there; it's a shithole that people want to leave as quickly as possible, the rent is really quit reasonable for the UK generally.
COR IS THAT CHICKEN KATSU CURRY
It is completely legal to pay a person to spend time with you. Anything that happens after that transaction is the personal business of two consenting adults.
He's better off on bennies.
Only if she's not being exploited. You're taking a gamble every time
It is now also an offence to make or promise payment for the sexual services of a prostitute if the prostitute has been subject to "exploitative conduct" (force, threats or deception) to bring about such an arrangement for gain. This is a strict liability offence (clients can be prosecuted even if they did not know the prostitute was forced).
Why would he work when he can live a comfortable life claiming PIP?
His life isn't comfortable at all. He lives in squalor. He's bored lonely and depressed, constantly being hounded by creditors, constantly trying to stretch his measly pittance as far as possible to keep his crippling alcohol habit afloat. He's a cutter and has no friends. He'll be dead in five years tops.
Glaswegian man unable to reproduce
im unable to reproduce but only because girls wont let me :(
Grown man. Wears a dress in public and calls himself a woman. Stubble visible an hour after shaving. Gets angry when you point this out.
Me, Crossy, Helper, Blad, Lollers and Shippy having a straight platonic relationship.
Not arbs?
Wonder what eva6 is doing rn
More interested on the lads having a pint not women.
Getting her turds churned by a well endowed black man
Migraine coming on strong. Always on the left side of muh head, and left eye, but found out I have another issue on the left side of my body, weird eye pressure in my left eye. Yay. This one could be a bugger, as it has the potential to lead to glaucoma and blindness in one eye.
Might have had astroke a few years ago, but I don't think I'll be lucky and get taken out by another, I'll just keep having bad luck, and end up a crippled half blind bugger that can't control his bowels or bladder.
Maybe some of us were made to suffer?
I think, a choon and bit of distraction is good for this moment in time.
BN, why is it you don't want to have sprogs again?
the actual legal debate here is genuinely interesting.
en.wikipedia.org
i don't know what the hell to think, 2lofty4me
That it is/was. Very nice stuff.
Britnormie is strictly DINK
reckon i'd go for something like licenced prostitution. you can't just look pretty and sell sex, you also need to complete a course that includes basic counselling/support work type stuff. weed out the psychopaths.
You're not a real man until you've had a sprog.
No DVDs tonight just beer. Feeling good and drunk.
It's not really interesting at all, it just comes down to aesthetic/moral disposition on the question of paying for sex and every argument that anyone makes it just used as post-hoc justification as such. In fact there isn't really any debate over the 'legality' of prostitution because the idea that we have some kind of coherent legal code is nonsense, as is the notion that the people who would ostensibly be considered legal elites are earnestly engaging in debate rather than astroturfing for political reasons.
Personally I do not give the slightest shit if someone wants to pay another for sex. All I would say is keep it off the street because I don't want to see ugly used up tattooed whores walking around and also make sure there's no trafficking going on or otherwise compelling women into doing it against their will because I don't want to see young women being turned into ugly used up tattooed whores in greater numbers than would otherwise happen.
i've thought about having a sprog. but only if i could inherit its body once it's mentally and physically capable. hss-sss.
My only two goals in life were to lose my virginity and have a sprog. I've achieved both. I can now relax and enjoy the rest of my life
there's probably slaves being forced to work uber too but they don't put you in jail if your uber driver turns out to be one of them. It's just feminist nonsense. Radical feminists hate men and hate sex work and want all men who engage in sex work to be punished. Even if there were no exploited prostitutes they would still push for this law.
have multiple sprogs with different women
ghost the babymamas
pay 0 (ZERO) child support
shippy spending his another saturday night talking about children
what a life
die of a fentanyl overdose while some guy has his knee on your neck
He's not known as 'Shippy the nonce' for nothing mate
he can't get his snazzy new keyboard to work.
Don't worry, I'm laughing at myself, not just an anon being mean
It's not really interesting at all
proceeds to give interesting argument
even in your shoulder-shrugging liberal way, what if people are INTO those harlots in fishnets, anon? if we both agree adults can just exchange money for sex, cool, what if it's on your turf? where's the line drawn?
men should be allowed to have financial abortions
make it 9 months too since that's basically what the abortion law is now seeing how many women get suspended sentences for killing 9 month fetuses and babies
Greg "Fat Greg" "Shippy" Austin the bumbling beanheaded bald bonce bumboy of Banbury.
The drivel compass is pointing towards Scarborough
What we up to tonight? These beers landing well. Listening to some Enslaved.
Haven't posted since
Feel like watching Tomorrowland. The aesthetic seems interesting, but I won't get my hopes up for much.
Wee lassie in that is cute tbqh.
Any cheb connoisseurs in? Who is this lassie?
Have 0 sprogs
Think with no evidence whatsoever I have a sprog (son)
Corr built for Big Black Cock
What do you spend the money you haven't spent on child support on?
How do I get a gf like this lads?
Just imagine being her. Her entire life lived on turbo-easy mode. Anything she wants, any partner she wants, never has to worry about money, every man desires her, every woman is madly jealous of her. Loneliness, depression, unemployment, money worries etc. are literally just choices for her.
Life not fair.
How do I get a gf like this lads?
Be black (probably)
everything is in english
BN has a half-Thai sprog in Phnom Penh
Kinda makes learning Arabic pointless then
wouldn't mind shagging a black lass personally
That's all well and good lads but I need a name so I can find more material and jerk my little noodle to her unattainable body
Thank god he didn't actually learn it then, eh?
Wear decent dress
That's vitaminmia, but that right here is her best content
Clowns
Can I use my e-scooter then? Dont see it on the sign
wonder how many textbooks SSM had to read before he learned arabic
no 4K recurding
Thanks pal, evening sorted
Very good question lad. Lets hope anon informs us.
it isn't always
stopped by that police roadblock in the distance
access tabuk? (didn't know what tabuk is)
huh? what do you need?
access tabuk?
I don't know what you need
waves to go on
Looked it up later and tabuk is a city with a big air base so I think they had checks for something that day
If I knew Arabic, even to a basic level, we could have had a conversation
Full viddy in 4K for you, dee lad. Cheers pixeldrain com/u/ADJNy7Nd
future provision
nor boomboxing or feeding the birds
Been wanking to a lot of AI porn lately, especially weird stuff involving tentacles. Need to normalise my wanking habits.
haven't wanked in a good four or five days, the first few days are fucking torture but now honestly don't feel the slightest bit compelled to coom
Corr feeling a bit fucked Crossy and Helper style.
Evidently those English translations are poor
Baby, you know that I miss you
I wanna get with you tonight but I cannot baby girl
And that's the issue
Girl, you know I miss you
I just wanna kiss you
But I can't right now so baby kiss me through the phone
(Kiss me through the phone)
I'll see you later on
Kiss me through the phone
(Kiss me through the phone)
See you when I get home
Getting wound up for days over someone learning a language
I'm going to start looking for a third bookcase
Getting wound up for days because you got made fun of for being monolingual
Pretty sure it's because you are very easy to ridicule
apus love cranking that woulja boy
Ruth's fanny in my mouth
Keir Starmer and Barack Obama took this from me:
Shippy you and I would have a great shared library. Fluent in foreign language and film.
Twolls bully him in the comments. It not rite one bit
Evening lads, how's life treating you?
Neither of them are preventing you from getting a girlfriend. What the fuck are you talking about?
how's life treating you?
Terribly, since I don't have a black wife like you.
Why would the massage place blackmail their own customers? They'd lose business. They don't have your private details so how would they eve do it? And it's not illegal so even if they tried you can just tell them to fuck off
post your black wifes tits and arse already m8
for me it's dvds, beer and me lids on britfeel
love you all, personalities and anonymous
god speed
i remember reading about this before it came out, sounded good. "it's a Disney thing, but"
Brad Bird + the LOST guy? weird futuristic shit Walt Disney was trying IRL? yeah, i'm on board.
temper your expectations i suppose.
Gonna watch a film I think.
because blackmail is their business, lad. voyeurism laws are questionable (and have become more questionable).
but even without the intervention of law or evil businessmen, people would cave of their own volition. shame is one of the biggest killers (of men, in particular).
Planning any more sprogs?
Sorry to hear it mate. Is it not having a wife that's getting to you or specifically not a chocolate woman in your life?
Let me think about it.
women: brb, gynaecologist
men: aaaaa Penis Inspection Day
Possibly. One kid is a lot of work and a lot of money, not sure that having a second would be a good idea right now, and honestly we might not be in a good position to have another for a little while. It's sad because I know she wants another, but really it wouldn't be good for us as things are. But also on top of that I'm on the fence about having more than one desu.
I FUCKING LOVE LOST IT'S MY FAVOURITE SHOW REEEEEE
yank slop
Which one? I've been watching Godard lately. His films are a bit annoying but interesting
You're talking rubbish lad. Their business is regular, paying customers
What's your fav? If you're a gooner Breathless is great but personally I enjoy La Weekend.
if mark had a job he would still live in squalor, he'd live in the same place and be four times more bored lonely and depressed
Decided on Dunkirk (2017)
Bait to trigger DVDlad?
I've been watching his films chronologically so I'm only up to Vivre Sa Vie. That's been my favourite so far, Anna Karina is so pretty
Nope. I like DVDlid.
bon voyage you english cunt
DVDlad posted his Vivre sa Vie Blu-ray a while back. Is he based or retarded?
Good evening all good lads. I hope you have had a smashing sunny Saturday!
Shout out to the DVD fella, going to watch The Greasy Strangler tonight, thank you for reminding me about it. After it I will watch S06E01 Voyager series, followed by Bocchi the Rock anime series.
Shout out to the other DVD lad, boring DVD haha. Nice keyboard, mate, hope you fix the USB issue! Leave the bloody axe where it is haha.
are you the gay bald man or the nonce
My son, who's on vacation in Colorado, just FaceTimed me from...Casa Bonita. They got a table right by the waterfall and cliff divers, already had some sopapillas, and were getting ready to go into the magic show. Manbearpig is roaming around amongst the tables and they are looking forward to Black Bart's Cave as well as the puppet show starring Hennifer Lopez (who is actually conman Mitch Conner.)
casabonitadenver.com
Hope I'm not a bullshit artist.
i have actually not watched it since the finale. was dead exciting at the time all the theories and the joke spoiler tag thing on Anon Babble and all that.
but does it hold up? ;__; i'm SCARED to go back.
"what's in the hatch?"
"dunno"
these were real conversations, zoomers could never understand.
IM THE HATCH WAS MY ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE
Shippy lives a full life. He is not in need of unloving, rubber-insulated sex in some seedy hotel. That is more something for "men" like Shut In Chad.
You're officially the world's biggest bullshit and horse shit artist.
Might go to American in July/August solo
His name is Shut in City. Only his fans call him Chad. God you're thick.
He made his woman watch the episode beforehand so she could better appreciate the experience.
He and were just giggling like maniacs as he filmed all around the place. All the announcement s are done in their best annooying voices like the traiker for Rob Schneider in The Stapler and the Eat Snacky Squares ad guy.
Dunkirk (2017) almost downloaded :)
Sending good vibes to all my lads x
oh god the entire series of Lost is going to take over my hard drive. oh well.
going to watch it as if it's just about some people on an island. fuck mysteries.
At local me. All kicked off x
what's happened lad?
also, is this real or an hallucination
All kicked off
You say that every week. Either your local is rough as fuck or you're LARPING
Been a very good week de lad.
push me into suicide posts incoming
Favourite TV Show
LOST
Favourite Film
Layer Cake
someone is, unironically, miffed that i typed 'an hallucination'
but 'an hxxx'? that has Anon Babble prodigy. feel old yet? then you have failed as a human. maybe YOU should 'an hxxx'.
*sigh* here we go again
Cooorrrr, love to hear it lid. I'm enjoying the last hours of freedom before the wife and little one get back. Got a lot done while they were away though. DIY, sorting out the garden, cleaning, all stuff that gets put on the to-do list and then never seen to with life being too busy and all.
i woke up super late and had a bath, thats it really
gross
does your black wife have a big arse lid?
Drama didn't involve me. I'm sound. Had 3 wints garn homes now.
good on you lad. keep your chin up and your head down.
A MOST PECULIAR MADEMOISELLE
What sort of a dive do you go to where it kicks off at 8pm?
Oh aye she's got a nice juicy one on her lid love those cheeks smothering my face I do x
Very nice of you fren, cheers
Heavily on the piss me in honour of HHL you are my idol dude
Corr I'd love to have anal sex with a black woman.
Aye got no time for drama. Stayed longer than planned as club is on exhaust fumes. It dying. Garn homes Nd order a webab me x
I probably won't destroy it, we'll just have to see how it goes. If things go tits up, I'll save the keys and cherry switches, I'm not that daft.
I am sort of joking. I probably won't go into destruction mode, I want to sort this issue, desu. I'll tackle it tomorrow.
are you gettign on the piss, lass?
pubs used to close at 8.30.
like, alcohol? i dont tend to, no
It's lush ngl, hope you live your dreams one day mate
What was you up all night doing?
chances of losing your virginity tonite?
Taking the piss garn home me x
on exhaust fumes.
speaking of schizophrenia, what do you lads do with the oil/fat when you fry beef?
feels mental throwing away good fat .
Stop it, Eva is pure x
just watching stuff, i think
seeing as im staying in all night, probably zero
y-you didn't get that from a shop called kokoro did you? specifically in liverpool did you
cuddling eva
Cum in Eva's arse? WAHEY!
Nope, a placed called lotus sushi, or little lotus sushi, not in liverpool.
Wag and a webab?
i love sushi, but rice is a bit offputting, but the salmon is nice
like, alcohol?
You're too pure for this place
Pak 111 brigade massing in Rawalpindi and Islamabad. Pakistani coup incoming after army refuses to follow ceasefire order from government lol.
I've not had fish sushi from there, just had a couple of the noodles, broth and dumplingy type stuff, or the rice and katsu a few times, and had the chicken teriyaki (love that, that's the more trad looking roll with rice on the outside) a good few times. I'm quite liking the stucky rice stuff that the pots are stuffed with.
Yeah it will be better tomorrow with a fresh mind.
This link gives a number of checks to try but before you try them tomorrow, mate, first try the keyboard in a different USB port.
thegeekpage.com
A day without a bag is a day lost
>like, alcohol?
You're too pure
lol reminds me of the bit in this:
newgrounds.com
i miss this internet. even this actual cartoon is on YouTube but it's segregated (try logging out google-users).
Stop fighting it Sean, get the bag, it Saturday x